Muffin Top

Remember when blueberry muffins were great? You know, that fresh baked smell on a Sunday morning. The warmth of fresh blueberries bubbling from the tops of golden goodness? Now, (this is for the moms out there) remember after you had your baby and everyone said, "Oh, after your first one, everything will go back to normal?" Muffins have taken on a whole new meaning. I say to those people who tell me everything will be the same- Wow, did you have a giant muffin top before you had your baby too? Well, I may have had a mini muffin, but sister, nothing like this!
Aw, I dream of the days where I wore a t-shirt and jeans without looking in a mirror and wanting to barf. What happened? Ah yes, I grew a human inside my stomach and now I look like a deflated balloon. So as I approach the one year anniversary of the first day I met my beautiful baby, I say, I have now entered the Muffin Top Club. What do you win? Having to throw out half your shirts because you will never, I mean never, look the same in them again.
Don't even get me started on the rest of the changes. I can only focus on one at a time. And to all those, "You'll look the same after you have a baby" people, yes Courtney, I'm talking to you you liar, thanks for the false dreams. To all the other members, wear your muffin top proud! I think we deserve it having to go through all we did. We baked a human for goodness sakes! However, instead of a badge of honor, a daily massage, person chef, housekeeper and someone to drive us around, we get to wear a permanent badge saying "yes, I had a baby". Thanks Mother Nature.